I have a strict "no-regrets" policy to my life. I think that every mistake I have made was educational and led me to places that I might not otherwise have found. So when I saw this month's theme for the Postdoc Carnival, what would you have done differently?, my answer was immediately: nothing.
I would not recommend my path to anyone, of course. I've sort of bumbled my way through academia and, after a few rough periods, ended up in a good place, on the path to an even better place. I'd always been "smart," and did well in school, but I had no idea how to go about pursuing an academic career, and the faculty at my snooty undergrad college were far from encouraging. So I didn't do any research as an undergrad - hell, I didn't even take any biology courses as an undergrad (I started out as an English major). When I decided to go to grad school, I had only very fuzzy ideas about what I wanted to study. I'm amazed I got in at all, but I did. I had some very bleak times in grad school, probably due to this lack of preparation, but I got through them and learned a lot from them. Now my interests have changed slightly, and I'm pursuing a career in a different department. My PhD is not in biology (but in something related), but I'm not going to let that stop me. My bizarre past has made me pretty darn interesting compared to many people who have followed a more traditional, focused path through academic biology. I've been to cool places! I've had to learn exotic languages! I've studied exciting animals that many biologists never get to see! My PhD project was 100% my own! I've had to do field work under really difficult conditions, and braved the bureaucratic jungles of tropical countries! I wouldn't exchange my experience and perspective for anything.
Of course, the bumbling ends here - I hope, anyway. I've learned a lot about how things are done, and I am working hard to do things the "right" way. I'm working hard to build up a respectably large publication record and to be involved in the larger scientific community. I'm taking notes on job searching and negotiating, to be prepared for the future. I'm going to be focused and prepared.
But looking back? No, I wouldn't change a thing.
EDITED TO ADD: Wait, no. I thought about it some more. There is one thing I would change. I wouldn't have had so many drunken fights with my adviser in bars. He may have respected me for it in his cranky old bastard way, but it's just kind of embarrassing.
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3 comments:
you got in because you're damn smart.
Now I want to know what happened to Geeka after that flight! Must pester her to tell us.
It's fantastic that you have made a satisfying journey out of a collection of random occurrences - but then I suppose we could all say that on some level. You seem more satisfied with it than others I've met.
I'm envious that your PhD project was entirely your own - mine was entirely someone else's and as I prepare my thesis for submission I still wonder whether it's "enough". But...that's a story for another day.
I started out as an English major too! I actually think a more meandering path can be better than the straight shot, which is what I did.
I know too many people (myself included) who find themselves at the end of a postdoc, after some 10 years of training, realizing they don't know why they took that path, other than because "that's just what one does" with a biology major.
Knowing what you want, how to get it, and why you want it, can make the rough times during training a lot more bearable. I wish I'd had that insight back then!
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